Marriage is difficult, there is no denying it. With the alarmingly high rate of divorce in our society, the warning signs that a marriage is not working or requires some serious maintenance usually present themselves well before it becomes too late.
Here are 5 signs you may be in need of some marriage counselling:
There is a complete lack of communication between partners. When the problems that are causing a marriage to deteriorate have become too frightening or dramatic to even bring up, it might be time to talk to a professional about it. Not being able to even begin to address the things tearing two people apart is a strong sign that a situation has become unsustainable and seeking help may be a good option.
You fight about the same things over and over. When reoccurring issues invariably come up again and again in argument and conversation, it is a reliable sign that things have devolved into a never ending loop of unresolvable animosity. It is unlikely to get any better without some sort of objective advice or opinion.
It’s always about the money. Disagreements over finances is one of the most common reasons married couples find themselves in constant confrontation. If one spouse is hiding information about family finances or feels the need to control every aspect of every spending decision made and is completely unamenable to the mutual sharing of the burden and responsibility, it might be time to suggest you discuss it with someone who can help you come to an understanding.
Diametrically opposed parenting styles. Children can be the glue that strengthen and hold a marriage together. Parenting can also be a major source of contention and disunity between partners. Raising children is perhaps one of the biggest and most responsibility filled undertakings an adult human being will accept in his or her life. Our need to both successfully create and raise children is a powerful human drive, and if a couple feels as though they are philosophically at polar opposite ends of the spectrum in terms of child-rearing, it can seem like a decisively unresolvable issue.
You still love your spouse and want to make it work, despite the differences. If you find yourself constantly at odds with someone but still acknowledge your bond and love for each other, making an effort to keep your relationship intact might be the best decision you ever make.
A marriage is work, but there are professionals whose job it is to help you work through your problems and reaffirm and re-establish the relationship that convinced you that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with someone in the first place. Learn to recognize when something isn’t working and know that there are things that can be done about it.